For every good film there are seven bad ones, but these are just the ones I despise most among the spring releases this year. Without further ado, watch this,
Not that:
Valentine's Day-Feb 12
Starring, Jessica Alba, Kathy Bates, Jessica Biel, Bradley Cooper, Patrick Dempsey, Anne Hathaway, Ashton Kutcher, Julia Roberts, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner, Queen Latifah, and Topher Grace. Wow, that's quite a cast, so large that there's no way in heck any of them will have enough screen time to be memorable. This is just wrong.
Valentine's Day Trailer
Cop Out-Feb 26
Wow. Just wow, this looks awful. They always put the funny parts in the trailer, unfortunately the laugh count for the trailer is negative 1. This looks about as funny as colon cancer. Stars Bruce Willis and Tracey Morgan
Cop Out Trailer
The Bounty Hunter-March 19
Two worthless actors, Gerard Butler and Jennifer Aniston, trying to bring in an audience to perhaps the most forgettable movie of all time. Sad. Not funny, just sad. Watch the trailer if you don't believe me.
The Bounty Hunter Trailer
Clash of the Titans-March 26
Remaking the 1981 cult classic wasn't a bad idea, but the execution was only successful in killing any chance of goodness this movie had. No doubt inspired by a certain 2007 film involving 1 fewer than 301 Spartans, and to me that is terrifying. In the worst way. Stars Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson (why!) and Ralph Fiennes.
Clash of the Titans (2010) Trailer
MacGruber-April 23
Films based on SNL sketches are hit and miss, (They hit the screens, and they miss the audience). This film was hastily thrown into production after the Pepsi ad that appeared during the Superbowl. Any film that goes from having no script or anything all the way to release in just 14 months can't be good. Especially when it's spoofing something that hasn't been on TV for close to 20 years. No trailer has been released yet...
Showing posts with label clash of the titans. Show all posts
Showing posts with label clash of the titans. Show all posts
Monday, January 18, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
New Year, Same Movies
Just got back from watching James Cameron's "Avatar". The movie was pretty good, but that's not what I'm going to talk about here.
I'm going to talk about the trailers, or rather, trailer. The lights went down in the theater and I witnessed the same trailer, again and again and again. The trailer was for different films, but it was all the same. Threatening music at the beginning, quick shots of random stuff and then a heavy metal song would kick in and there were quick shots of random action. Stop, someone says a line and then go into montage of random destruction. Wash, rinse, repeat.
I witnessed millions of dollars thrown around on screen, again and again and again. All the trailers built to the same point and flashed their title too quick to see, or else I just didn't care.
One film stood out from the rest, not going with the "gritty" and "dark" look of the other films. This was the trailer for an unconventional movie based on an unconventional comic book, "Kick-Ass". Yeah, that's the title, and it looks like this movie will RULE. However, this was the lone exception, and there were at least 5 trailers (almost certainly more, but I lost count because I just didn't care).
It became clear to me that we now live in an age where special effects extravaganzas are commonplace and boring. Why? They make so much money, it inspires studios to make them again and again and again. And we keep buying tickets.
It's unfortunate, but I have no doubt many people will pay to see the same movie several times this coming year, under different titles of course. And next year, they'll do it all again. But I won't.
I'm going to talk about the trailers, or rather, trailer. The lights went down in the theater and I witnessed the same trailer, again and again and again. The trailer was for different films, but it was all the same. Threatening music at the beginning, quick shots of random stuff and then a heavy metal song would kick in and there were quick shots of random action. Stop, someone says a line and then go into montage of random destruction. Wash, rinse, repeat.
I witnessed millions of dollars thrown around on screen, again and again and again. All the trailers built to the same point and flashed their title too quick to see, or else I just didn't care.
One film stood out from the rest, not going with the "gritty" and "dark" look of the other films. This was the trailer for an unconventional movie based on an unconventional comic book, "Kick-Ass". Yeah, that's the title, and it looks like this movie will RULE. However, this was the lone exception, and there were at least 5 trailers (almost certainly more, but I lost count because I just didn't care).
It became clear to me that we now live in an age where special effects extravaganzas are commonplace and boring. Why? They make so much money, it inspires studios to make them again and again and again. And we keep buying tickets.
It's unfortunate, but I have no doubt many people will pay to see the same movie several times this coming year, under different titles of course. And next year, they'll do it all again. But I won't.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)